All Sex Toons is the first site of its kind that I've been given the pleasure of reviewing here. The name is kind of misleading though, because it leads you to believe that there's more than just Japanese cartoons to this site. It should have been named Hentai Neckbeard Plaza or something. In any case, if you like anime or hentai or adult cartoons (i.e. if you're a drooling fanboy), you'll love it here. But there's also lots of hardcore, masturbation, lesbians, blowjobs, young girls, big boobs, demons/supernatural elements, and hilarious mistranslated movie titles as well. The free tour makes this very clear. And they do it without a single rape tentacle in sight, which is a rare and generous gift. Those hentai producers, they love the tentacles.

Maybe I spoke too soon about those tentacles; the homepage's background is purple. Uh-oh. Anyway, back on topic. The top of the site has a helpful toolbar and an explanation of what your membership gets you. Below that is the most recent update, with past updates and links to the bonus sites further down the page. You're just a few clicks away from a magical, spiky haired world where all the women sound like they're sharing a helium bong and all the men are totally clueless about everything. By which I mean all the content is readily accessible and well organized.

The content, being hentai and all, ranges from extremely creative and interesting to weird and alien to all that's good and true, all the way back to curiously mundane. It's all purchased too, but I don't even know where you'd buy hentai these days anyway, so exclusivity isn't as big an issue here as it otherwise would be. It all looks nice though, as well animated as hentai ever is, with vibrant colors and subtitles when appropriate.

As for the All Sex Toons models, there really aren't any. They're cartoons. I guess they're all hot, but cartoons aren't really on the same playing field as real women for totally understandable reasons. Still, these hentai honeys suck, fuck, take ridiculous, stylized cumshots, and probably choke back a tentacle at some point. I'd prefer not to think about that, though.

Pictures here are screen captures that look as good as the movie they're captured from. Each movie has a page of them, and they follow the progression of the movie, minus all the boring plot parts.

The movies are full-length, available to stream and download, and can be viewed whole or in segments. Again, the colors are clear and bright, and everything is well drawn when viewed within the context of that style. The vaginas in particular are exquisite, and I'm sure you can see every sucker on every rape tentacle.

The extras here are bonus sites, 36 of them to be exact. All Sex Toons is the only cartoon site in the network, but most other reasonable niches are covered by these sites, and more than one toon site would be an extravagance.

I say go ahead and sign up for All Sex Toons, if only for the novelty and the fantastic bonus package. Be warned though, you might not be able to look at calamari ever again.

Reviewer: david
Review Created: 2007-03-22 15:25:43
Last Updated: 2007-04-02 16:41:38

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